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unfinished
Welcome aboard the Mein Kampf, owned and operated by Fascist Industries. So far we're doing very well. Our stocks are stable, employee morale is good, and the annexation of the Mein Kampf is pro...
Ok, things are not as rosy as I projected to you, but this downsizing is very good for our company. It's something we planned to do anyway once the spin doctors figured out how 100,000 job terminations could be sold as economic mobility. And as for the annexation, you are going solo on this one, but I'm sure that is what you wanted. Arming the ship's self-destruct, on the other hand, is probably not what you wanted but hey what else are you going to do over there? Besides, you are getting paid for this stuff anyway.
The self destruct mechanism is shielded behind you. You will be required to flip three switches to activate it. To prevent the switches from being pressed accidentally, which happened quite often in the earlier ship designs for reasons never disclosed, each switch has a safety cover. The release for each cover is handled by a separate division head, all of whom, coincidentally, are related.
Switch one is handled by K'Lava Tür, he is in charge of something roughly translated as "Plasma Discharge and Other Things Mom Hates."
Switch two is handled by K'Lava's brother, Bk'Lava Tür. Being slightly older, he handles "Gardening". This cannot be the right translation, but you work with what you have.
Finally, switch three is handled by the eldest of the three bothers, Ht'Ma O'Reilly. Ht'ma handles all other aspects of the ship. Did you notice a family resemblance in these photos? Anyway, we've managed to capture a janitor who worked aboard the Mein Kampf to get some idea as to the layout of the ship. It provided the following sketches.
This is a sketch of Buchi Buchi Gali, he is head of the engineering core that configured the self-destruct mechanism and the complex computer program that- ...err, no. Actually this is the janitor's favorite mop, D'Lene. Hold on. USE MORE HONEY! .....gaaaahhhhhh!
THIS is a sketch of the safety cover control room. There are three of these rooms, one for each switch. Flip the switch to expose the mechanism and strike when ready. Also, once its safety cover is removed, you'll still have to strike the self-destruct switch with your fist, head, or whatever body part you use for that sort of thing. ....aaaghhh! ...gluck....
Were not sure where these rooms are located so you'll just have to improvise. Once done, make your way to the hanger deck. There are escape pods there and I'm sure you'll be anxious to leave once the countdown begins. Keep up the good work. --END MESSAGE P.S. - You're doing so well without us giving you weapons or ammunition the boys in the boardroom, if they survive, are thinking of cutting your weapons budget and deploying you buck naked. When you have time, write us a memo with your thoughts on this.
